Adoption: The Death Crawl

No... this is not a negative post. It is actually meant to encourage... to uplift... but still to be realistic.

First of all - over the holidays I had a few people very tentatively ask me about Sara... and if we think we are going to ever bring her home. Apparently I haven't done a very good job of letting people know that YES, we emphatically believe that Sara WILL COME HOME. We are completely committed to that - and we have an attorney with the tenacity of a Pit Bull. She won't give up - and neither will we. So I feel very confident that Sara WILL COME HOME. When...?.... that's another story. However, I don't want anyone to ever feel that they cannot ask questions, shouldn't mention Sara - or that we (as a family) are so fragile that we will "fall apart" if someone brings up the topic. That's just not the case. Sara is a very big part of our lives... it is actually harder for us to NOT talk about her. She is a regular part of our daily conversations here in our home... she is included in our prayers each day and each night - and she is constantly on our hearts and on our minds. To act as if she doesn't really exist...is actually more difficult and more painful than to talk about her and about our fight to bring her home. So please... anyone that has questions... JUST ASK.

All of this led me to think about the entire process of adoption. It is so perplexing to me how and why the process for one family can go so smoothly... and then you have another family that seems plagued with problems and issues. It seems that there has to be a reason for this... but that's really not how things work. Things just happen. Sometimes those things are good... and we all rejoice when good things happen for those families. Sometimes they are not such great things - but as a community... we all feel the pain for those families as well and we try to support one another and share that burden.

The adoption process is hard. People sometimes don't get that. It seems that some people think that just because you aren't carrying around that baby with you... and going through the hormonal changes and the physical labor pains... that the process is "easier" than giving birth. I haven often wondered. I have never given birth to a child... so I cannot make this call myself. But I have wondered many times if the process of one is more difficult than the other.

I have a movie that is a favorite of mine... "Facing the Giants". It is a movie that was written, directed and produced by a church congregation in Albany, Georgia and is about a football team that overcomes incredible odds - and praises the Lord regardless of their circumstances. If you know me... you know that my very favorite scene in the movie is called "The Death Crawl". A scene where one of the "leaders" of the football team is challenged by his Coach to CRAWL a certain number of yards carrying a teammate on his back. It is an awesome testimony of what we are capable of doing... when we TRUST BLINDLY and do our best, giving our ALL... even if we don't know when the end is in sight. I have found a clip of the scene on You Tube... and while it still gives me chills to watch just the clip, I encourage you to buy the movie and watch the entire thing! (I say buy it - because not only will you want to watch it again... you will want to share it with others.)




Adoption is a lot like the DEATH CRAWL. We don't really know when the end is in sight... and we don't really KNOW what is going on in whatever country we might be adopting from. We have to trust - with BLIND faith. And that's not always easy. However, my goal is to keep moving forward... to press on even when it's hard. Sometimes we don't think we have anything else to give... but we have to press on and keep giving our all. In the end, we have to know that we left everything out on the "field" ... and my hope is that through all of this adoption experience our actions will bring Glory to the Lord.

Like I said... I have no idea which is harder....I can only speculate at the pain involved in giving birth... and truthfully speculation is enough for me. I asked my mother one time, "How bad is it?" She very simply answered, "It hurts... but in time you forget it...in the end it's all worth it... and then you end up doing it all over again."

I may not know about the physical pain of natural childbirth, but I do know about the emotional pain and the roller coaster ride call adoption. It hurts, but in time you forget... and in the end it's all worth it. And then... you end up doing it all over again.